Techniques to try at home

Below are some of the techniques I teach to students at Trevvett. Please contact me at or at 804-261-5060 if you have any questions!

Mindfulness/Anger Management:

10-0: Close your eyes and count down from 10 to 0 slowly

5-5-5:  A deep breathing technique. Breathe in for 5 counts, hold for 5 counts, exhale for 5 counts

Smell the flower, blow the candle:  Imagine smelling something delicious and then blowing out a birthday cake!

Rollercoaster: Trace your fingers, beginning with your thumb. Go up and down the “rollercoaster” as you inhale and exhale.

SQUEEZE: Squeeze you fists tight for 5 seconds, then release. Variations include pressing your hands together, raising your shoulders, curling your toes, etc.

Positive self-talk: Be kind to yourself! For example, instead of “I can’t do this” think “I’m going to do my best.”

Happy place: Think of a safe, happy place. What does it sound like? Look like? Feel like? Smell like? Taste like? Who is there with you, or are you alone?

Check in with yourself (be mindful): Place your feet flat on the floor. Feel them on the floor. Work your way up your body, thinking about each part of you. Where do you feel tense? Roll out the tight areas. Once you get to your head, bring yourself into the room. Think about where you are. What do you hear? What do you feel? What do you see? If someone is talking, look at the person. What is he wearing? What color is his hair? Then zero in on his words. Try to focus just on the words that you hear. If another thought comes into your head, let it drift on by like a cloud. Bring your focus back to the words the teacher is saying.

Other ideas: Get some water. Go for a walk. Exercise! Play. Color.


Small Problem Solving/Conflict Resolution: A small problem is a problem a student can solve by his or her self. A student needs an adult’s help to solve a big problem. Below are some “small problem” solutions!

Walk away

Talk it out

Go do something else

Tell them to stop

Ignore (if your child mentions Captain Ignore… he is a superhero who’s superpower is pretending people who bother him are invisible)

Let’s make a deal! (this one is all about compromise)


Share and take turns

Wait and cool off

Let it go!


Tease Blocks: Teasing is a small problem that students can handle themselves. Some ways to “block” a tease:

Say “so?” “so what?” “whatever” or “I don’t care”

Agree with the tease

Change the subject

Say, “Thank you!”

Give the teaser a compliment

Make a joke

Walk away

Go do something else


Talk it out

Tell them to stop


Bullying: Bullying is a big problem. Students need an adult or at least some other kids to help them.

Bullying is MOO: mean, on purpose, over and over

An upstander is someone who stands up to bullying! A negative bystander is someone who sees bullying happening and joins in or does nothing at all.


Bucket Filling: Each person carries around an invisible bucket. We fill buckets when we are kind and helpful, and we dip into each other’s buckets when we are mean, rude, and disrespectful. I tell students, “Try to fill a bucket today!”


TKN: Is it True? Is it Kind? Is it Necessary? When you hear gossip, give it the TKN test! If the information is true, kind, and necessary, you can pass it along. If not, keep it to yourself.